Sharing My World on a Tuesday

It is Tuesday, right? (checks calendar) Yep… okay then, here we go with this week’s questions from Melanie over at Sparks… Check out her site, she’s an interesting and witty person to know. Onto the questions.

What was the last thing you read, digital or print? So, print it was a book about opening a resale store called Too Good to be Threw (Amazon link, and no I didn’t pay that much for it, are you crazy? O_o) I’ve read it before when I last started along this path and am now reading it again along with a few other books about opening a store — resale or otherwise. I’m almost done with one called Why We Buy (amazon link), which is pretty insightful. Digital-wise I read an article about store layout and customer flow which directly quoted the above book (Why We Buy), concerning two things, that we here in the States tend to turn right when we enter a store and tend to go through stores in a clockwise fashion and that there’s a phenomenon called the “butt-brush” effect that the author — Paco Underhill — discovered. Basically it says that shoppers — both men and women, but mostly women — will give up on an item if they are jostled from behind. There’s a lot more, but that’s an interesting thing you’da though retailers would be aware of but they weren’t. The simple solution to the butt-brush effect is to keep your aisles as open as possible. Why We Buy is an interesting book and I’ll probably write a blog about it later when I’m finished. Too Good to be Threw is the one I read last though — print-wise. 🙂

Pen with paper that reads extrovert and introvert with check boxes
can’t I be both?

Are you more an extrovert or introvert? I call myself an extroverted introvert. By this I mean that I enjoy my own company and I have no problems being alone for extended periods of time. Like all day long for most days, you know. Extroverts get their energy from socializing with other people, but I don’t really *need* friends or a social circle to fill my energy bar. Though I will admit that it’s very nice to have friends, and I miss having people to talk to on a daily basis. I guess that need will be filled when I open my store? Maybe? I dunno. Also, it’s nice to have a social circle to fall back on when needed. I mean, I’m there for my friends when they need me, and it would be nice if they could be there for me should the situations be reversed (hasn’t always happened, but hey, that’s life — I don’t do things in hope of reciprocation, I do things because it’s in my nature to help when I can). Anyway, even though I’m okay with my own company, I’m also okay in a crowd and can socialize with the best of them. I’m actually outspoken, forthcoming, and gregarious when I’m in a crowd of people. I tend to joke and laugh a lot and people find me companionable. I’m not socially awkward and I don’t really need to decompress whenever I am thrust into society. It’s nice to get away from the crowd, but I don’t need to do so — usually. That being said, too much of my own company and/or too much socialization makes Willow an unhappy camper. There’s got to be a balance there somewhere. And that being said, if I had to chose between being in a large group of people (like a party or a concert), or socializing with few friends (dinner or a small party) and/or staying home by myself. My choice in order would be: staying home, hanging out with one or two people, and then going out with a large group of people. That’s why I say I’m an extroverted introvert. Because I prefer my own company, but get me into a crowd, and I’m pretty outgoing.

How is your life different from what you imagined as a younger person? So, when I was younger (much younger) I was a huge fan of shows that had travelers in them, like the original Kung Fu with David Carradine and the original Incredible Hulk with Bill Bixby. I also read a book called Go Ask Alice at an age when I was probably entirely too young to read it — the book came out when I was five, so I could have read it any time from age ten on… but definately before I was 15. I’m pretty sure of that. And all of the characters in these stories were tragic and romantic, running from terrible pasts and living on the edge of society but doing their best to fit in with the world around them. They mostly just wanted to be left alone. That’s how I felt, really. My childhood sucked rocks and wanted nothing more than to run away from it, but I was a practical child and knew that I had no marketable skills and no money to live on, but dammit, I really though that being a traveler would be a good way to live. And you know what, dear reader? I basically became what I wanted. I always had the fear of being homeless that kept me working enough to keep a roof over my head, but I moved… a lot. I’ve criss-crossed this great country of ours (counts) five times and I’ve lived in (counts) 11 states, and (counts)… I think about 18 cities and I want to say… 28? addresses? I’ve lost count… ^_^ I have it written down somewhere. And that’s just counting the states and addresses since I divorced my first husband back in 1994. Being married to Doug has slowed down this traveling thing quite a bit. I mean we’ve only moved three times in the last six years. And we’ve lived in this house for almost four years, or is it over four years? This time thing is hard when my mind doesn’t want to brain. Like, I’ve never lived in one place for four years in my life! That’s gotta be a record, y’all. So to answer the question directly, my life is pretty much how I expected it to be when I was a younger person. Though I envisioned by now I’d have more chickens. ^_^ I dunno why.

Image result for grim reaper i'm just here for the cake

Do you think about dying?   Does death scare you?  Why or why not? I do think about dying. I have a strange mind. I know this because I’ve had conversations with other people and they’ve told me that their minds do not go to these places. Anyway, whenever I go to sleep at night, I know for certain that it could be the last time I shut my eyes. I don’t think it will be the last time I will shut my eyes, but I know that the possibility is there. Two of my dogs sleep in the bed with me and I’m fully aware of the fact that I might wake up to a dead dog in the bed with me in the morning. I am also aware that any of my pets might die at any moment because death just happens at any moment. It doesn’t have a set schedule. I’m also aware when I wake up in the morning that I might wake up to a dead husband, and whenever Doug leaves in the morning I tell him I love him and I bid him to drive safely because I want the last words he hears from me to be good ones. I dread the police coming every afternoon to tell me he’s died in an accident. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t wait by the door for the police to come and tell me he’s been in an accident. I just know the possibility is there. That’s why if Doug is going to be late by any significant time, I want him to call me so I know he’s alive.

This might sound like I’m constantly worried about those around me dropping dead at any moment, but that’s not true. Just because I’m aware that something will happen doesn’t mean that I’m worried it will happen or that I’m vigilant about it. I don’t become alert and afraid if, say the cat hasn’t moved in an hour because cats tend to sleep for long periods of time. I might glance to see if he’s still breathing though, just like I used to put my hand on my newborn kids’ stomachs back in the day because they lay so still when they were sleeping. Sudden infant death syndrome is a thing I was aware of and it didn’t hurt anything to put a gentle hand on their tummy to make sure they were alive. You know? Do I fear death? No. It’s simply a part of life. I’ll mourn the loss of anyone around me when they’re gone, but that’s because I selfishly don’t want to lose them. That’s just being human. I’ve stared death in the face a couple of times and my thoughts were roughly, “But I still have stuff to do…” which of, course doesn’t matter. No one dies with a clean slate.

Interestingly enough, when I played the SIMS for the first time last week, my first SIM character was taken by death very suddenly and without warning, and it was actually kind of — slightly — traumatic for me. Like the first time one of my companions died in Skyrim. I wasn’t prepared for it, and I wasn’t finished with the character, but as I mentioned above, no one dies with a clean slate. You can’t get your affairs in order because there will always be something else to do. I can cheat death in a video game by putting on god mode, but in life it will come for us all, or as Caitlyn Doughty say, “Remember deathlings, you will die.”

GRATITUDE:

I found this interesting challenge and did it myself.  I’m offering these questions as a gratitude challenge for those who care to do it.    You can answer in text or photo. 

(courtesy of https://ididnthavemyglasseson.com/2019/04/20/find-something/)

Additional Gratitude Bonus Question:  Who has been the kindest to you in your life?

So that answer to both of these gratitude questions is the same… Doug. There are a lot of things in this world that make me happy, but he makes me the most happy, or is that happiest? Eh, six of one, half dozen of the other. He makes me smile. I love to smell him — ironically I liked his smell better when he smoked, but he quit so yay for him, but he smelled better with tobacco. I enjoy looking at him, especially when he smiles. I don’t have a favorite color, but whatever. Everything, including human beings are “in nature” so that makes him my favorite thing “in nature” because he is my favorite thing in the whole wide world. And he’s very useful to me for a variety of reasons. Not only that, but he’s been the kindest person in my life. All 50-some-odd years of it.

It’s why I love him. So yeah… Doug fills all of those boxes (except color because whatever). So yeah, Doug…

catana comic You make it easy to be happy
He really does. Image by Catana Comics

Brought to you by Melanie’s Share Your World

3 thoughts on “Sharing My World on a Tuesday

  1. Marilyn Armstrong

    I wanted to travel and first married a man who was not going ANYWHERE. It was one (of many) reasons I ultimately felt we were better off apart. I went to Israel and he stayed in Hempstead … and actually, died there, too. I didn’t travel as much (for fun) as I wanted to, but I got to live overseas and that made a huge difference. I wanted not only to move but to become a part of a different culture and living overseas did that.

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  2. Melanie B Cee

    Aw ❤ to the Doug answer. You guys are SO CUTE! ❤ Thanks Willow for Sharing Your World. If you're as tired as I am (I'm physically exhausted for some reason), then this was indeed a gift! Your energy might have been used elsewhere, but I'm so glad you spent it with me! 🙂

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